Quantum Physics and the Art of Departure: Short Shories by Craig Lancaster

Author:Craig Lancaster [Lancaster, Craig]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Fiction, Literary, Retail, Short Stories
ISBN: 9780982782255
Google: cnxiXwAACAAJ
Amazon: B005H9BH2E
Barnesnoble: B005H9BH2E
Publisher: Missouri Breaks Press
Published: 2011-08-13T04:00:00+00:00

(I’m going to say this for the benefit of anybody who thinks I’ve got a good thing going to this point: When you buy that snazzy new phone—and you will, my friend, or I’m not doing my job correctly—and you sign up for that unlimited data plan, it’s important to note that data and text messaging are not the same thing. Had I known this, I’d have not come home to a woman who still lived in my house, who stood in the living room quaking with fury, holding a thirteen-page-thick cell phone bill and screaming, “Who in the hell do you know in Billings, Montana, who you send 5,314 text messages to in a month?” What can you say to that? I said, “Well, we weren’t talking about the weather, that’s for sure.” I want you to learn from my mistakes. Paying the unexpected $800 bill is the least of the indignities. That night, I was living in a pay-by-the-week motel and my friends—Facebook and otherwise—had begun to flee the Good Ship Moron.)

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